If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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