At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize