I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Randomize