I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
