i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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