So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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