So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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