spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just google imaged poop.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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