you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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