lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
