I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
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