okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize