So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Randomize
