Do you still have your period?
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
