Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
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