ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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