i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
