Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
