C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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