no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
you traded sex for a burrito?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
