Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
