Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
