If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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