i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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