I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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