Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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