i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize