I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
