nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I deserve this hangover.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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