Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
