You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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