WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
