Pants 0. Shit 1.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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