Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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