Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
