he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
