I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Randomize