Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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