if you like me you must not know who I am
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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