I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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