is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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