Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
