Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
