so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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