I want to stick my p in your. b.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Walk of Shame today included voting.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize