He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
