Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
