I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
