I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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