do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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