white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
